I’m having such a conniption over this reporter’s comment about minimum wage.

Quoth she:

I made minimum wage for 5-plus years and can’t remember ever thinking “MW should be higher.” 

I’m not gonna lodge a personal attack, just going to break this down in numbers because numbers are impartial and I am a ball of aneurysm-bursting rage right now. But I’m keeping it all inside. ::breathes:: Okay…

New York Basic minimum wage in 2011, according to the U.S. Department of Labor website, is $7.25 an hour. That translates to $15,080 in a year.

I used calculator.net to figure out take home pay percentages and bankrate.com to figure the amount of New York State income tax rates and determine the percent of state income tax deductions per paycheck.  On an annual income of $15, 080, the percentage is determined to be 5.9% between a taxable income of $13,001 and $20,000.

Claiming no federal allowances and no 401K contributions, the calculations come up to this:

Monthly Pay of Annual Income of $15,080.00

Amount

gross pay                   $1,256.67

federal income tax          $134.12

social security tax            $52.78

medicare tax                   $18.22

state income tax              $74.14

city income tax                 $0.00

deductions                       $0.00

final pay check              $977.40

Now the fun begins:

Average apartment rental rate in Albany/Schenectady/Troy in 2011: $902 for a 1 bedroom (according to apartmentratings.com. To be fair, it reports the rate as 783 for 2012, but we’re going on last year’s numbers. Also, have you EVER known a landlord to lower the rent? Trollface.jpg, I’m just sayin’)

I, personally, pay 800 a month (750 if I pay on time) in rent costs.  My utilities under the budget plan are 150.

So, if I had a 40-hour a week minimum wage job this is how my monthly budget would breakdown (and these are the BAREST necessities. I’m talking no entertainment budget WHATSOEVER and assuming I have no credit card bills or medical bills or children to feed):

Take home pay after taxes       $977 

Rent                                     -750

Utilities                                 -150

Food                                    -200

Bus fare (7-day monthly pass to

get to and from wherever weekends) -65

Laundry                                     -20

Remainder:                              ($208)

Whoops. I might be able to coupon that down to a negative 150, sure.

My point is that it is incredibly difficult to get by on minimum wage.  For the 0.5% that can make it work, I applaud your life choices. But reality sometimes gets in the way and for the rest of us this is just not feasible.

Words With Friends, Rebel Style.

When I was a child I could only eat olives when they were mixed in with my grandma’s potato salad. They were just something I tolerated. And goat cheese…the very idea made me get a little sick up in my mouth. But I loved cake. 

Now? I love olives and goat cheese. Especially mixed with hummus in a pita pocket. And it’s good for me??

I discovered this is what happens to men and women. Men eat cake until they realize that the whole time, olives and goat cheese were what they really needed (and oh shit! actually love!). And they were there the whole time. They just didn’t realize how awesome they were. 

Olive oil contains monounsaturated fat that’s good for your heart. 

It’s good for your heart. 

It’s good for your fucking heart. 

Think about it. 

But now there’s this article decrying the previous posting. Hmm. Where my science types at?

Is this true?

This article links to another posting on the University of Alberta website about the employment of dichloroacetate to cure cancer cheaply and effectively. If it’s true, holy crap!

But this was posted 4 years ago….Why is this now just making the rounds?

It’s always the same argument…

“You could come home”

“I *have* a home here”

“You have an *apartment* there”

“Yes, and I have friends who are like family, a job, two cats*, and I happen to like it here”

“With all the snow and ice?”

“YES”

And as easy as it would be for me to go home, save rent, pay off bills, etc, I would be miserable as fuck. And lonely. And cut off.

*that will not do well living with your six dogs and oh god, why on earth do you have half a dozen when one or two would suffice you’re going to end up on an episode of Hoarders now that grandmother is dead.

::hyperventilates::

Also this. Thank you, @kevinmarshall

thekevinmarshall:

BWA HA HA HA HA!

desertmar:

cognitivedissonance:

And it’s just as fantastic as it sounds:

Watch the video:

The look of shock on her face is incredible. Elijah is brave little man, and I commend him.

Wow, bravo little dude, bravo.

Just inject this right into your brainbox.

Related note: Must. Find. Film.

I wrote a piano riff using my Master Piano app on my phone.  I can’t afford a piano at the moment. I’ve always wanted to learn.  I used to have a Casio about a million years (okay, 25 years) ago and I played it all the time, tinking out popular songs from books that I’d been given.  I still remember which keys correspond to which notes. I just never had any formal training. We couldn’t afford it when I was growing up.

I’ve forbidden myself from purchasing one until I get all my financial ducks in a row, but thanks to technology and for a mere zero dollars I was able to tinker out a riff that was pleasing to my ears using an app on my phone.  This tickles me more than you can imagine.

I’ve loved music all my life. Not a day has gone by since as far back as I can remember that I haven’t listened to something.  I even got busted once at daycare when I was four; I had this stuffed dog with a radio in its belly and I listened to it pressed up against my ear on the lowest volume possible laying down on my mat during naptime, but it got taken up by the daycare worker.

My mother grounded me once from the radio when I was 15.  I remembered that she had given me when I was 10 (and I still had) one of those 101-in-one electronic kits that you get at Radio Shack with the wires and springs on a circuit board…with instructions to make your own FM Radio. And I did. That lasted me until I ceased to be grounded and I got my tapedeck back.  A little sneaky and deceptive, but I was 15 and you do have to admire my ingenuity.

I’ve always admired musicians that have a seemingly overflowing cup of creativity when it comes to making music. I’ve always been drawn to piano music and have a soft spot in my heart for Beethoven, Freddie Mercury, Damien Rice, Tori Amos, Billy Joel and Elton John for this reason.  I support them for singing the feelings of my heart and for touching that dark recess where the light doesn’t shine, illuminating my life. For giving birth to feelings that before had no words.  I lack this talent in myself, but occasionally I get a trickle of creativity and I make note of it.

I learned to play guitar in my late teens and even wrote a wordless tune with the four notes that I knew by heart.  Later, I purchased on impulse one of those blank music journals with the intent of writing it down, but I never got around to it. It’s still in my head, though.  If I took a few minutes, I could pick it out again.

It’s rare that Euterpe blesses me with inspiration and as I was tinkering around with this piano app I fingered out a new tune.  This time I’m going to make an effort to put this one down in my blank music journal, as well as pick out that guitar lick and write that one down as well.  I was inspired this morning by an article I read about how Leonardo da Vinci kept a notebook with him at all times, scribbling down ideas and things to do and remember.  Nearly 500 years later, my phone has become an electronic version of that.

And while I never learned the piano when I was younger, that hasn’t stopped me from giving up on it.  I may be 38 before I finally fulfill my goal of buying one and teaching myself (or having someone teach me) how to play.  Maybe then Euterpe will stick around for a while and I can put more things down in that notebook.

Robert Browning says, “He who hears music, feels his solitude peopled at once.”  I wholeheartedly agree.  It has carried me through so much in my life.

So, 88-key electronic keyboard and stand, I will see you in a couple of years when all my loans and debts are paid off.  Until then, thank you, technology, for this handy little app on my phone.